


I call it magic when I’m with you

by Toomanyfandoms99



Series: (No Longer A) Secret Marriage [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, M/M, Secret Marriage
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-08
Updated: 2018-02-08
Packaged: 2019-03-15 15:26:38
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,493
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13616220
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Toomanyfandoms99/pseuds/Toomanyfandoms99
Summary: Dean took a breath.  “Okay.  Fair’s fair.”The whole room seemed to go still, waiting for him.Here we go.“I’ve been secretly married to Castiel for three years.”





	I call it magic when I’m with you

**Author's Note:**

> The title is taken from the song “Magic” by Coldplay. Enjoy!

Dean Winchester realized that he was in love with Castiel in Purgatory. 

He was throwing the latest Leviathan to stumble onto his path against a tree, knife skating across the creature’s throat, yelling “where’s the angel?” for the umpteenth time and spraying its blood after receiving no answer, when he realized it.

He was in love with Castiel. Hopelessly in love with him, in fact.

In this instant, he had another realization: he didn’t feel the least bit ashamed about loving an angel in a male body.

Huh. 

————

And it turned out, Castiel loved him too.

————

They kept their relationship a secret. 

From everyone.

Not because they were ashamed — Dean reasoned to Cas one morning — but because their relationship was just for them, and they didn’t need the monster of the week or their Big Bads using their love for each other against them.

Dean and Castiel came to a mutual agreement to keep it a secret no matter what. Or until the world decided to give the Winchesters — Castiel included — a break and let there be a final battle that let the dust settle for the last time.

————

Dean married Castiel on a Thursday. It was only fitting, after all, since Thursday was when Cas saw the light, the beauty of Dean’s soul, and betrayed his brethren so that Dean could have free will and another chance at life. 

Thursday was when Dean met Castiel in a barn, lightbulbs shattering on the ceiling, dark angel wings shadowing the wall, and Dean’s life changed forever.

Thursday was when Dean finally had the guts to kiss Cas for the first time — and let himself have this — holed up in a Kentucky motel after a bloody witch hunt.

Thursday was when Dean made love to Cas for the first time — a few months after their first kiss — in Dean’s room at the bunker, when Sam had gone on a salt-and-burn case.

Thursday was when Dean told Cas that he loved him, loved him so much that it scared him, loved him more than words could express. 

So Thursday was when Dean and Cas got married in a silly wedding chapel with only the priest as a witness. This wedding was for them, for enduring more than people did in a dozen lifetimes.

And kissing Cas that day was the closest thing that Dean could equate to perfection. 

As long as they had each other, had their profound bond, had their faith in each other, had their love — a word that could not begin to describe Dean’s feelings for his angel, but would have to suffice — the hunter and the angel would get through anything thrown in their path.

————

Dean surveyed his foe carefully, trying to keep his dignity whilst tied to a metal chair bolted to the concrete in a nondescript warehouse.

The pack of vampires had caught him unaware, had kidnapped him and his makeshift family — about to tuck into a homemade dinner, courtesy of Jody — with the help of some knockout gas.

Dean saw Sam, Jack, Jody, Donna, and Claire in the same situation as him, but unlike him, their chairs were bolted in a line near a wall on his left. These vampires had singled him out, kept him away from his family.

At least Cas wasn’t here.

Oh. 

They wanted Cas. 

Shit.

Dean shut out the thought spiral he was about to go down, and got a good look at the lead vampire. It was like he was trying to look like a douchebag.   
Dean wanted to roll his eyes. He couldn’t wait to gank him.

The vampire saw Dean was becoming more coherent with his surroundings, and decided to put a knife an inch away from his throat. 

Wonderful.

The vampire grinned, putting his fangs on full display. “Hello there, Dean Winchester. From the stories, I thought you would be taller.”

Dean grinned menacingly. “I thought vampires weren’t supposed to look like trashy Hollister models.”

The vampire only grinned wider. “There’s a compliment in there, I think.” He let out a laugh and let the knife tap against Dean’s skin. “So, here’s the deal: I need to know where Lucifer and your pet angel, Castiel, are. Now. Or I’ll let your pals” he motioned to Dean’s family, who were waking up from the gas, “watch me kill you slowly.”

Dean wanted to growl — Cas was not his pet — but he decided to go with the truth. “I don’t know where Lucifer or Castiel are.” He wished he knew where Cas was; he knew that something was wrong with him from the phone calls, wherever he was. He could be hurt, bleeding on a motel floor right now, and Dean couldn’t do shit about it.

The vampire stood up abruptly. “Alright then. We’ll do this the hard way.” As the vampire walked towards his now-alert family, going for Claire — for Christ’s sake — the monster suddenly looked back at Dean. The glint in the vampire’s eyes was dangerous. “I have a better idea.” The vampire rested his knife on Dean’s throat again. “Tell me a secret.”

Dean wanted to laugh, but he bit down on his tongue to prevent him from doing so. “A secret?”

“Yes, Dean. But this can’t be any secret.” This vampire was unnerving Dean with his dramatics. “It has to be a secret to end all secrets. And Michael tells me that you have one.”

Dean squinted his eyes. “How would Michael know that?”

“Well, a little birdy told him that Lucifer spent some time in Castiel’s head, and one night, Lucifer got drunk and spilled some information to some friends of his.”

Oh.

Lucifer was in Cas’s head.

Lucifer knows.

Dean swallowed. After all the pains he and Cas went through to hide their marriage, it was unraveled in minutes when Lucifer returned, when he took over Cas’s body and manipulated him.

This was the secret that the vampire wanted.

Dean looked at his family, none of them speaking and all of them enraptured. All of them were thinking “what secret, Dean? What secret?”

Dean swallowed again, looking into the vampire’s dark eyes. “If I tell you this secret, will you let everyone else go?”

No one was coming to save them. Might as well be practical about this. He hoped Cas stayed away, and he has so far.

Oh, something was definitely wrong there. Dean would have to find Cas when this was over.

It was just a bombshell he had to drop on his family real quick, then they could get to finding Cas.

The vampire said, “I will let them go.” He motioned to a lackey that just entered the room to leave the door ajar for an escape. “I’ll even untie them.” Another lackey actually loosened their ties, Dean watching in carefully controlled shock.

Hm.

If Dean weren’t so grateful, he would question the vampire to no end. He glanced at his family, watching and listening closely to what he was about to say. They were curious, and he couldn’t blame them.

Dean took a breath. “Okay. Fair’s fair.”

The whole room seemed to go still, waiting for him.

Here we go.

“I’ve been secretly married to Castiel for three years.”

The warehouse was utterly silent for a moment. Then, the vampire laughed and laughed for a long time, the sound echoing throughout the room. Dean kept his angry and resolute composure.

That’s when everything went sideways.

A flash of light encompassed the entire warehouse, Dean and his family squeezing their eyes shut from the intensity of it.

When Dean finally opened his eyes, all the vampires were reduced to ash on the floor.

And the long-dead Gabriel was standing before him.

“You’ve gotta be fucking kidding me,” Dean said, unimpressed.

Gabriel’s smile got even wider at his comment. He untied Dean from his chair and said, “Hey there, Dean-o. How’s it hanging?”

Dean huffed and stood up from his chair. Might as well skip formalities and ask the real question. “Why did you reveal yourself now?”

Gabriel, for once, didn’t comment on the quick change in conversation. “Well, the thing is, and this is a crazy one: I actually care about my baby brother.” Dean knew this to be true, deep down; Cas had told him some stories about what a good brother Gabriel was when he was younger. Dean’s poker face didn’t seem to deter Gabriel from his spiel, because he continued, “And I know that he’s in trouble. So, I’ve come to offer my help.”

Dean raised an eyebrow. “You didn’t bring any tricks with you?”

Gabriel sighed. “No, Dean. My big brother hat is on.”

Dean could tell the archangel was actually being truthful. The usual spark in Gabriel’s eyes was noticeably absent. And Dean knew a thing or two about protecting a younger brother. Gabriel was genuinely worried for Cas, and Dean knew that look better than anyone.

“Okay,” Dean said, “where is he?”

“Asmodeus has him. And Lucifer. In Crowley’s old headquarters, which is currently topside.”

Dean sighed. “Fucking Asmodeus.”

“Fucking Asmodeus,” Gabriel repeated, looking just as angry as Dean at the Prince of Hell.

Dean wanted to kick himself for not checking up on Cas sooner.

“So, are you in Dean-o?”

Dean smirked. “You didn’t even need to ask.”

“Good.” Gabriel paused, as if considering his next words. “Congrats on the nuptials, by the way. About damn time you two got your shit together.”

Dean grimaced. He didn’t know what to say to that. 

Dean finally had the balls to look at the people who meant most to him — barring Cas, of course. They were out of their chairs, looking at Dean in various states of confusion and shock.

Dean decided that this conversation with his family could wait. He put on his gruff voice and said, “I’m going after Cas with Gabriel. You don’t have to come if you don’t want. You can’t stop me from going, though, so don’t even try.” He saw Sam gaping like a fish, and added, “we’ll talk about this later.” When Cas was safe, Dean’s mind supplied.

————

They all came, piled into three different cars. They traveled in perfect formation to Crowley’s former lair and Asmodeus’s new stomping grounds.

They were going to go in hot and fast.

Dean was barely containing his rage, his anger at himself and at circumstances that prevented him from finding Cas earlier.

Gabriel noticed Dean’s expression — screwed up in frustration — from the passenger's seat of Baby, and said, “calm down, Dean-o.”

That only made Dean shoot Gabriel a look that once brought a demon begging on its knees for mercy.

Gabriel threw his hands up and huffed, “we’ll just sit in silence, I guess.”

Dean glanced in the rearview mirror and saw Sam leveling him with Bitch Face Number 23. Dean pursed his lips, unimpressed with Sam’s glares.

Dean’s mind quickly went to Cas. He thought of his eyes — so ridiculously blue that they should be illegal — and how they always seemed to read him, his heart, his mind, his body, his soul. He thought of his angel’s smile, so rare to behold, so rare that it seemed only he ever saw them, so rare they were like gems to be cherished, so rare and so perfect that they, without fail, made Dean smile too. He thought of his laugh, the gravelly sound that managed to seem...well, angelic, a sound that only Cas could emit, a laugh that made Dean’s heart and soul sing in response every time he heard it. He thought of his angel’s voice, so rough yet so tender when he said Dean’s name, when he said his trademark “hello Dean”, when they spoke in the darkness and safety of Dean’s room about anything and everything, when he told Dean how beautiful he was, and made Dean truly believe him, that he was good and brave and worthy of love. Dean thought of his angel’s imperfections, his heart of gold, the brush of his wings that Dean swore he felt when they were intimate, his tendency to run away, his overprotective nature, and Dean realized, in the span of a few minutes, how much he freaking loves Cas, and how much he needs him in his screwed-up life.

Oh, those demons were going to get ripped apart, slowly and painfully. Dean would make sure of it.

————

When Dean, Gabriel, and his family entered Asmodeus’s lair, Dean saw red.

————

He didn’t know how he got to Cas, but that didn’t matter to Dean.

The trail of blood and ash was enough for him to know what he did to get there.

Dean opened a door, and saw an unconscious Cas, chained to the ceiling and the walls, IV drips placed on his arms and legs, draining his grace into plastic bags.

Dean had a strong stomach, but he wanted to puke his guts out.

Cas...darlin’...

Before Dean could do anything, Gabriel was at his side, taking it all in.

“Help me, Dean,” Gabriel said quietly, a pained expression mirroring Dean’s own face.

Dean and Gabriel got to work getting Castiel free.

————

The whole calvary went to the bunker next, after finding Lucifer and Asmodeus mysteriously missing. That wasn’t pertinent now, anyway.

Dean and Gabriel set Cas up in his room, locking the door behind them. They didn’t need any distractions or questions right now.

The hunter and the archangel each sat on a side of Cas’s bed, absorbing the sight of his prone form for a few seconds. Dean felt another piece of his heart break.

“Okay,” Gabriel said, “I’m going to start healing him. It’s going to take days for him to fully recover. You need to be by his side as much as possible.”

Dean asked, “why’s that?”

Gabriel replied, “your profound bond means that you have some of Cas’s grace in your soul. You can help him by being near him or holding his hand. He’ll feel the grace in your soul, and it will soothe him. Make the process less painful.”

“Huh,” Dean said. “Didn’t think my job would be that easy.”

Gabriel snorted. “You’ll still have to take care of him. I can’t be here all the time either.”

“Alright then,” Dean said, grasping Cas’s hand and brushing his knuckles with his thumb. Gabriel —wisely — didn’t comment, beginning the healing process.

————

On the first day of Castiel’s coma, Dean was cornered by his family in the kitchen at breakfast.

He should have seen it coming, honestly. He’d delayed an entire night already.

Sam was quick to silence everyone’s chatter. As Dean poured a cup of coffee — no alcohol for him; he probably won't touch it for a long time — and scrambled an egg, Sam entered his vision.

Sam asked kindly, “is it true, Dean?”

Dean took a sip of coffee and said, “if you mean it’s true that I’m married, then yeah. I’m married. What of it?”

The following silence was deafening. Undeterred, Dean put his scrambled egg on a plate and started eating on the kitchen counter.

Jody stepped up to the plate next. “Dean, I get you not wanting to tell me or Donna about this, but your brother? Why keep him in the dark?”

Dean sighed. “That’s not what this was.” He gathered the courage to look at the sea of faces before him. “I’m sorry for not telling any of you. It’s…” Dean couldn’t finish his sentence. He guzzled down some more coffee. He realized absentmindedly that he didn’t put in sugar or cream. Oh well, that didn’t matter. He liked the bitterness, anyway.

As Dean was finishing his eggs and coffee, Claire came up to him. She asked, her voice uncharacteristically small, “is he okay?”

Dean looked at her hopeful eyes and hated himself for replying, “I don’t know.” He started washing his plate and mug. “Gabriel and I are working on it.”

“C-can I help?” Dean turned to Jack’s eager face.

Dean’s face fell. “I’m sorry, Jack. I don’t see how...it’s just…” Dean sighed. “It’s hard to explain.”

Sam went to Jack and supplied, “Gabriel’s an archangel, which means he can heal Cas. Dean has some sort of...bond thing...with Cas, and that helps him too, I guess?”

Dean finished washing up and said, “that’s about right. I have to get back now.” Dean left the kitchen without further distractions, and without looking back.

————

On the second day of Castiel’s coma, Sam found Dean in Cas’s room, a chair pulled up to his bedside, reading the first Harry Potter book.

If this were under any other circumstance, Sam wouldn’t let Dean hear the end of it.

Sam took in his older brother, reading two pages, flipping to the next, glancing at Cas’s pale and peaceful face, then continue reading until he had to turn the page again, and he would look — adoringly, he might add — at Cas’s face, and the cycle would repeat.

Sam wanted to slap himself. How could he have missed this? Dean and Cas were better at hiding than he realized.

Or he had gotten so used to the sexual tension that he never considered that they would figure out they were perfect each other and act on it.

Sam cleared his throat, Dean leaving the book facedown on Cas’s nightstand. “Yes, Sammy?” Dean asked casually.

Sam regarded Cas’s sickly pallor. “How is he?”

“He looks better than he did yesterday. He’s healing slowly.”

Sam nodded before asking, “how are you?”

Instead of making a snarky comment that he would later regret, Dean said, “I don’t know.”

He did know. He was beating himself up for not getting to Cas earlier. And he would continue to do so until Cas woke up already and admonished him for being foolish, until Cas pressed his lips to Dean’s forehead in the way that made Dean feel powerful and weak at the same time.

Sam walked closer to Dean, kneeling to the height of Dean’s chair. “Dean, I want you to know that...I understand, okay? You don’t owe me an explanation or anything.” Sam smiled, a sight Dean had not seen in months, and added, “I’m really happy for you. Everyone else supports both of you too.”

A weight that Dean didn’t know existed lifted from his chest at Sam’s words. He didn’t crave acceptance, but it was something he needed to hear nonetheless.

Dean clapped Sam’s shoulder and said, “that was a nice chick flick moment.” Dean mock pulled a face. “Let’s not do that again, for a few months at minimum.”

Sam chuckled. “You’re an asshole, Dean,” he said fondly, standing up and brushing off his jeans. “Later, jerk.”

“Later, bitch.” Dean waited for Sam to leave to pick up his book and hide a smirk behind it.

————

On the third day of Castiel’s coma, when Gabriel was taking a break from healing, Dean talked to Cas. Like he was awake. 

It wasn’t creepy, Dean reasoned. People in comas can hear the people around them anyway. Right? 

Right.

Dean closed Cas’s bedroom door and settled into his comfy chair at Cas’s bedside. Seeing Cas lying so still for three days was starting to unnerve him. And he’s heard, from multiple sources, that talking helps.

So Dean took a breath, held Cas’s hand, and began. “Hey, Cas. I’m really banking on the fact that you can hear me right now. If you can’t, I suppose I’ll have to repeat this to you one day. If I ever get the courage to, that is. I just...I don’t think I ever told you about the moment I knew I loved you, the moment I knew that...that you were the one for me. You won’t believe it, Cas. I realized it in Purgatory.” Dean let out a little laugh. “Purgatory! Of all places!” A chuckle. He cleared his throat. “It was when I was trying to find you.” Dean felt a flurry of emotions rise up so fast he nearly got whiplash. “God, I was so...angry. They took you, and I...I don’t think I had ever been more angry in my life. Ever.” Dean felt the images, the memory, coming back to him. “I just...I needed to find you. I was interrogating a Leviathan, asking where you were, and after I killed it, I...I realized that...the reason I wanted to find you so bad, why everything in me hurt so bad, was because...because I love you, so goddamn much, and I wouldn’t let anything get in the way of that.” Dean realized that he’s been crying, since the middle of his impassioned speech, but he soldiered on. “So, it took Purgatory for me to get my priorities in order, for me to...to realize that you’re the only one for me, that you’re practically my soulmate.” Dean used a shirtsleeve to wipe the tears falling from his eyes, some of them drying on his cheeks. “I love you so much, Cas. I really wish you’d wake up soon.” Dean paused and said, “I miss my husband.” And the way he said my husband — something he rarely said aloud — brought a layer of warmth to Dean’s insides. He added dreamily, “and I’ve missed looking into those eyes of yours, darlin’.” Dean pressed his lips to Cas’s forehead — to show reverence, Cas once told him — and wiped his tears, pulling himself together before anyone demanded entry into the room.

Little did Dean know that his entire makeshift family was listening, ears to the door, trying and failing not to cry at Dean’s speech.

————

On the fourth day of Castiel’s coma, Dean’s family started to visit the angel —and Dean himself — in Cas’s room.

Claire and Jack came first, just after breakfast. Dean was finishing the third Harry Potter book when he saw the two young adults frame the entryway. Dean looked at them, having a sudden realization after they exchanged greetings.

Claire and Jack were his children too. 

By marriage.

Dean bit down a smile. He would keep that one to himself, for now. And with this, Dean realized something else.

He didn’t mind that at all. 

After Claire and Jack spent the morning with Dean, Jody and Donna brought him a sandwich for lunch. They spent some time discussing cases and catching up. Whenever Dean would glance at Cas, Jody and Donna would share a knowing look, though neither dared to mention anything out loud.

Then, in the early afternoon, Sam entered the room with Gabriel.

Laughing.

Dean bit down a smile as Gabriel began his next round of healing, Sam remaining nearby. Dean decided it was safe to keep his hand secured in Cas’s. He noticed that color was returning to the angel’s cheeks. 

Cas was getting better, finally.

————

On the fifth day of Castiel’s coma, Gabriel finished the last round of healing.

Gabriel promised him that Cas would wake up that very night, so that he and Dean could talk before Cas was bombarded by family the next morning.

Gabriel also told Dean that he made Castiel more powerful and healed the years of wounds he’d acclimated. Gabriel even fixed Cas’s wings, bringing him to full strength for the first time since Dean met Cas.

Dean was almost moved by all that Gabriel’s done for Cas.

Before he could thank him, or create a chick flick moment, — those were mostly reserved for Cas, anyway — Gabriel said he would see them tomorrow and left Cas’s room.

————

That night — a Thursday, Dean realized — at nine o’clock on the dot, Dean saw Cas’s eyes open, and find his immediately.

God, he could write poetry about those eyes.

“Hello, Dean,” Cas said, his voice rough with disuse. It was the most amazing sound Dean had ever heard.

Dean was probably grinning like a lunatic, but he didn’t care. “Hey darlin’.”

Cas’s mouth quirked upward at his favorite pet name. “You found me,” Cas whispered.

Dean’s face fell. “I’m sorry I couldn’t get to you sooner.” He stared at his hand, still joined with Cas’s.

“Hey,” Castiel said sharply, Dean returning his gaze. “Don’t beat yourself up. I know you have been. I’m here now, okay? That’s what matters.”

Dean smiled wanly. “You’re right. I can’t help blaming myself, sometimes. How do you feel?”

Cas thought for a moment. “Good.” A spark rose from the depths of his eyes. “Really good, actually.”

Dean squeezed Cas’s hand and said, “Gabriel’s back. He healed you.”

Cas looked surprised, but nodded in understanding.

“I feel...stronger,” Cas said, as if mentally checking his faculties.

“Gabriel said that you would be,” Dean affirmed, inching his chair as close to the bed as possible, pressing a kiss to Cas’s hand. “I have something else to tell you,” Dean forced out. 

Might as well tell him, get it over with. 

Castiel waited, and Dean said, “they know.”

Dean didn’t know what he was expecting Cas to say, but it wasn’t, “okay.”

“Okay?”

Cas grinned, and Dean felt a wave of pleasure throughout his body at the sight. “Okay.” Cas’s tone, so sure of himself, nearly floored Dean.

After a moment of reading each other’s eyes, Cas ordered, “come here.”

A pang of desire hit Dean like a freight train. Dean slipped off his flannel shirt that’s been hanging over his gray tee, leaving it on the chair that’s become his home. He laid next to Cas on the bed, in his shirt and sweatpants, their faces a mere inch apart on the pillow.

“Hey there,” Dean breathed, fighting back a blush and smiling nervously.

Cas brought his hand up to Dean’s cheek, brushing his stubble and swiping his thumb across Dean’s parted lips. “Hey,” Cas whispered, his voice close enough to rumble through Dean’s bones. Dean held back a shiver.

He suddenly remembered something. Dean’s fingers travelled underneath the pillow, closing around the object he was looking for. He pulled it out so Cas could see, and he gasped.

Dean’s wedding ring.

Dean slid on the golden band, Cas mojoing his silver band — from wherever the angel had hidden it — onto his left ring finger. They held their hands together, letting the metal rings glint in the lamplight. They both took a moment to revel in the happiness, now that they had each other again.

Cas let out a sigh of contentment and said, “we should take turns.”

Dean bit his lip. “Telling our story?”

“Mhm,” Cas hummed.

Dean raised an eyebrow, a coy smile playing on his lips. “Aren’t you forgetting something?”

Cas raised an eyebrow, a twinkle in his eyes. He feigned confusion. “What ever do you mean?”

Dean’s hand brushed Cas’s cheek as he positioned it around the nape of Cas’s neck, playing with a tuft of black hair. “Where’s my kiss?” Dean pressed his forehead to Cas’s, their lips millimeters from touching. Dean paused there, his eyes flicking to Cas’s. “Hm?” Dean brushed their noses together for a second — an Eskimo kiss — and waited for Cas to close the distance. 

He only had to wait a second longer for Cas’s lips to press softly against his.

Kissing Cas always made Dean feel at ease, peaceful, downright blissful. This was no exception.

A few seconds later, when they both needed air, Dean knew he couldn’t delay any longer.

So, Dean told Cas everything about his kidnapping, the vampires, Gabriel returning, Cas’s own coma, and anything in between. In return, Cas told him about his captivity, how he had no idea where Asmodeus or Lucifer or Michael were, how he hadn’t seen them in a long time. Cas told Dean that he overheard Dean’s speech — how he fell in love with Cas in Purgatory — and thought the words were a figment of his imagination until he saw Dean’s expression upon waking up. Cas told Dean that he loves him too, just as much as Dean loves him — even more so, in fact — and will always love him.

After a few hours of talking and holding each other, Castiel told Dean to get some sleep, and that he’d be there to watch over him.

Dean pressed a final searing kiss to Cas’s lips, murmured, “goodnight, darlin’,” and fell asleep with the help of Cas’s grace.

————

Cas woke up Dean at seven in the morning, an hour before breakfast was usually served. Dean got up after his usual complaining, taking one of Cas’s lighter navy blankets with him and wrapping it around his body like a cocoon, walking across the hall to his bedroom. He showered and dressed quickly, but, after noticing a chill in the bunker, kept the blanket wrapped around his green tee and flannel — Cas told him once that he liked it when Dean wore green. He also realized, with a start, that with the blue blanket around him, he was wearing their colors.

Dean shuffled back to Cas’s room, walking in on Cas just about to put on the AC/DC tee that Dean gave him all those years ago — his boyfriend shirt, Cas called it once. 

All the tan skin that Cas was displaying made Dean release a low whistle before he could stop himself. Cas’s entire face and neck turned red, and Dean felt accomplished.

“Didn’t know I was getting a striptease this morning, darlin’,” Dean drawled flirtatiously.

Cas only blushed harder, putting on his shirt before more damage was done. Dean could tell that Cas didn’t trust himself to speak just yet. Dean took this opportunity to move closer to Cas, wrapping his arms around Cas’s neck loosely.

“Are you ready to go out there soon?” Dean asked, looking for any sign of second thoughts in Cas’s electric blue eyes.

There were none.

“Yes, I just…” Cas paused. “I wanted to check on my car first.”

Dean threw his head back in laughter. Gaining his bearings a moment later, he commented, “yet another reason why I married you.” After kissing Cas chastely, Dean answered, “Sam got it for you. It’s in the garage.”

“Good,” Cas said, breaking their embrace and retrieving his keys.

Dean shrugged Cas’s blanket closer to his shoulders and followed him.

————

Once they got to the garage, Dean and Cas were intercepted by Gabriel.

“Cassie!” Gabriel exclaimed, throwing himself into Cas’s arms in the span of a breath.

“Gabe,” Castiel said, hugging his older brother back.

“Come to check on that tan monstrosity you call a car?” Gabriel teased.

Cas raised an eyebrow, ready for a fight. “If you talk about my car like that again, I swear-”

“Calm down, Cassie,” Gabriel admonished. “I’m just glad to see you’re on your feet.”

Cas huffed. “I suppose I should thank you.”

“You’re welcome,” Gabriel said cheerily.

Cas proceeded to his car, opening the passenger door and popping out a tape. He shut the door and held the tape like it was something precious. Cas locked eyes with Dean and shoved the tape in his hands.

It was Dean’s AC/DC tape that Cas borrowed a few months ago.

Dean closed his fingers around the tape. He didn’t know why he felt like crying right now, but he held it in. He said, in a voice too raw, “do you still have-” 

“Yes,” Cas said, reading Dean’s emotions like a book and offering him a smile with his eyes. They still had an audience, after all, and they had to keep it — somewhat — together. Dean nodded in understanding, and Cas broke eye contact with him.

Dean cleared his throat, held onto the tape for dear life, and said, “I’ll leave you two to talk.”

With the swish of Cas’s blanket on his shoulders, Dean left the garage.

————

Sam, Jody, Donna, Claire, and Jack were already in the kitchen when Dean arrived, who had forgone Cas’s blanket.

Just as he poured a mug of coffee, he heard Gabriel and Cas’s voices growing closer.

Everyone else stiffened. Dean, who was facing a cabinet, smirked.

An instant later, Gabriel and Castiel burst into the kitchen. They were both laughing at some joke Gabriel must have told. Dean’s heart skipped a beat involuntarily when he heard Cas’s laugh.

Dean’s family exclaimed their surprise at Cas’s sudden entry, tripping over themselves and greeting him. Dean took a sip of his coffee — he didn’t forget cream and sugar, this time — and took in the scene before him, unable to contain his grin. Everyone was taking turns hugging Cas and asking how he was. Cas, unused to the attention, answered questions quieter than normal.

Dean scrambled eggs and ate them quickly at the counter, watching his family surround Cas at the table. Gabriel came to stand by Dean, taking in the same image Dean was, not saying a word.

Dean could get used to this.

————

Dean didn’t see Cas again until that afternoon.

Watching Empire Strikes Back. With Claire and Jack.

His angel was such a nerd. He probably wanted to show Jack the original trilogy.

Dean walked in at just the right time, because he heard Darth Vader say he was Luke’s father, and Jack let out an unforgettable gasp at the plot twist. Dean, not giving up his presence, laughed silently as Cas and Claire smirked at Jack’s reaction.

Dean suddenly realized that this little family on the couch — comprised of two young adults that were technically Cas’s children and Cas himself — was his.

Before Dean could slip away, Cas noticed him and gave him his “come here” look. 

He could never say no to that look.

Dean slithered into the room — Claire and Jack murmuring hellos — and sat on the armchair next to the couch, since Cas was currently squished between the nephilim and the young hunter.

Without further ado, Dean turned to the screen, watching the end of the movie and Return of the Jedi with his family.

————

At dinner, with only Gabriel absent, Dean’s family felt comfortable enough to ask about his marriage to Cas.

Dean was not thrilled, but if it would get them to understand, it would have to be done.

The first thing the group noticed were Dean’s gold ring and Cas’s silver ring. 

“Those rings are cute,” Donna said. “Right, Jody?”

“Real cute,” Jody chimed in.

Sam cleared his throat, like he always did when he was nervous or uncomfortable, and said, “Dean, you never really answered my question from a few days ago. Why didn’t you tell us?” The lack of accusation in his little brother’s tone made Dean feel more at ease.

“Well,” Dean said, “we got married just for us. And we didn’t want anyone to use it against us.” Dean’s eyes widened. “Oh. Right.” He glanced at Cas. “Everyone's gonna be gunning for us, more than ever now.”

“I’m ready if you are,” Cas replied, his immediate and firm resolve causing butterflies to go wild in Dean’s stomach. 

God, he’s such a teenager.

Dean fought back a blush and said, “I’m ready too.”

Claire was next. “So. Have you two always been a thing, or-”

Cas chuckled, Dean hiding behind a glass of water. “No,” Cas answered. “And that’s Dean’s fault.”

Dean set down the glass with a thunk and faced his angel. “Excuse me?” Exasperated, he added, “I got there in the end, okay?”

Cas snorted and said to Claire, “I’ve always had ‘a thing’” he put a thing in quotations, making Claire smile, “for Dean, for the record.”

Claire commented, “thought so.”

“Sorry that my brother’s slow on the draw, Cas,” Sam said, Dean giving his brother a murderous look. Jody and Donna just laughed.

“Apology accepted, Sam,” Cas said.

“Don’t encourage him!” Dean exclaimed to Cas, the angel shrugging in an “oh well” gesture.

Sam asked his next question. “Were you dating in secret before you got married?”

Dean made a pfft sound. “Of course.”

“Skipped the whole engagement thing, though,” Cas added.

“Why’s that?” Jody asked.

“Well, I didn’t see the point. I mean…” Dean thought for a beat, then continued, “engagements are just a buffer between dating and marriage, right? With this life,” he shrugged, “I didn’t see the point of waiting.”

Out of the corner of Dean’s eye, he saw Cas give a soft smile, reserved for him, one that was gone in a fraction of a second.

Cas added, “and we’ve both died a bunch of times already, so-”

Dean laughed through a sudden flash of pain. Just a few months ago, Dean thought he had lost his husband forever. What Sam had mistaken for Dean’s guilt was actually the bereavement of a widower. Dean looked at Sam, and saw the very same thought flashing through his head. Sam had a look of understanding in his eyes, and Dean pulled away from Sam’s gaze.

They spent the rest of the dinner talking and enjoying each other’s company.

————

That night, Dean was in the bathroom conjoined with his bedroom, shaving his facial hair with the door locked.

He had an inkling that Cas would come to him, tonight.

And he wanted to look good for Cas. Sue him.

Dean did a careful, close shave, taking his time, drawing out the motions. When he finally washed his face and cleaned himself up, he put on an olive tee that was just the right amount of tight and complimented his green-gold eyes nicely. He paired the shirt with dark gray pajama pants.

He didn’t want to look like he was trying too hard, after all.

Dean left his blonde hair slightly messy, took a breath and gave himself a final once over in the mirror. He looked pretty damn good, if he did say so himself. He took another breath, unlocked the door, and opened it.

Cas was leaning against Dean’s door, which was locked shut, his AC/DC shirt riding up his waist and his blue pajama pants hanging slightly lower than usual.

Cas’s eyes pierced right through him.

Dean glanced at the floor, batting his eyelashes and clearing his throat inaudibly. It was almost ridiculous how, after years of being together, Dean still got flustered so easily.

He wouldn’t have it any other way.

Cas’s voice was suddenly hoarse when he said, “I want to try something.”

Desire pooled in Dean’s stomach. He bit his lip, not trusting himself to not sound wrecked when he spoke, and that was just from eye contact and Cas’s voice.

Dean swallowed and prompted in a choked whisper, “oh?”

The heat in Cas’s gaze set Dean on fire. A corner of Dean’s mouth lifted, his eyes resolute, not breaking contact with Cas’s. 

His angel moved closer, until he was a foot away from Dean. Something was brewing in Cas’s mind, Dean could tell. Something that would wreck him more than he was right now.

Oh, Dean couldn’t wait.

Cas said, “I’ll take the way you’re looking at me as acceptance.”

Dean worried his bottom lip, Cas following the motion, and nodded in affirmation.

Then, faster than Dean thought was possible, Cas had him boxed between Cas’s body and his bedroom door.

Dean was glad that no one else in the bunker had a room nearby.

Dean wrapped his arms around Cas’s neck, their lips meeting eagerly and passionately. Cas’s arms were around Dean’s waist, his hands traveling to his waistband. Every time their lips parted for air, Dean found his lips occupied a mere second later. Dean gripped the nape of Cas’s neck tightly, pulling slightly on his hair. 

Then, Cas lifted Dean into the air, all while keeping Dean’s back pressed to the door, like he weighed nothing.

Fuck.

Dean groaned in pleasure, draping his legs around Cas’s waist and keeping his arms looped around Cas’s neck.

Dean breathed erratically, looking at Cas eyeing him hungrily. Another few breaths, and he said hoarsely, “you should have led with this.” Dean leaned his head down, meeting Cas’s forehead with his. “This is hot,” Dean breathed, noting the unmistakable lust in Cas’s eyes.

Their lips met again, and again, and again, until Dean felt dizzy from the perfection of it all. Dean took a few quick breaths, noticing how destroyed Cas looked, and said roughly, “I think it’s about time you took me to bed, husband.” Cas downright growled when Dean drew out the word husband, making no small amount of pride stroke Dean’s ego.

Cas kept his hold on Dean, taking him to bed with their lips locked.

As Dean’s back hit the mattress, he knew this was going to be an incredible night.

————

Cas woke Dean an hour before breakfast, just like the previous day.

When Dean opened his eyes to a ruffled and shirtless angel beside him, Cas’s eyes a mixture of joy and peacefulness, he felt a rush of contentment throughout his body.

Waking up next to his husband will never get old, Dean’s sure of it. 

Especially after a night like that.

Dean must have been staring a tad too long — his mind playing back the events of last night — because Cas’s eyebrows furrowed, like they did when he was confused. “What is it, Dean?” He asked, his voice honeyed.

Dean smiled brightly, his hand brushing over Cas’s messy hair and stroking his cheek. “‘S nothing, darlin’.” He paused. “Is it too early to have a weird question?”

“It’s never too early,” Cas answered.

Dean didn’t know if he wanted to do this, but if he didn’t, he would always wonder. He turned around, pulling out his pair of Hellhound glasses from his nightstand drawer. He turned back to face Cas.

Dean looked down at the glasses, not having the courage to look at Cas, and explained, “these Hellhound glasses don’t just see hellhounds. They see angel wings too.” Cas’s silence was making him nervous. “I was wondering i-if I could put them on a-and see your wings.” Dean mentally kicked himself for stuttering.

Dean looked up at Cas, who had been silent throughout his request.

Cas sighed. “I...they’re nothing special, Dean. They may be repaired, but…I just...they’re a source of shame, for me, a-and...” Cas bit his lip. 

Dean blinked. “Shame?” He was instantly furious on Cas’s behalf. “Those angel bastards…” He hissed, the anger inside him intense. With new conviction, Dean moved closer to Cas, who was giving him a look of surprise. Dean gave Cas a peck on the lips and said, “listen to me, darlin’.” He heard Cas swallow thickly, barely holding back tears. Dean positioned his face an inch away from Cas’s, their noses almost touching. Dean looked into Cas’s watery eyes and said, “you’re the best angel that God ever created. You know why?” Dean brushed a lone tear from Cas’s cheek. “Because you’re worth more than every angel put together. Because you care. Because you feel.” Cas let out a shaky breath. “Because you love me,” Dean paused, before drawing out the syllables, “Castiel Winchester.”

Cas’s floodgates burst open at his full name — the name he cherished just as much as he cherished Dean — and he let his tears fall uninterrupted. Dean brushed them all away, placing errant kisses on Cas’s cheeks.

After a few moments, Cas said thickly, “I love you.”

“I love you too,” Dean said, kissing Cas briefly.

When Dean pulled away, Cas asked, “still want to see my wings?”

“Mhm,” Dean hummed excitedly. Cas smiled nervously and positioned himself crisscrossed at the end of the bed. Dean — still completely bare under the covers, he realized belatedly — rested against the pillows, putting on his Hellhound glasses.

He was in awe at what he saw.

Cas’s wings were pitch black, the span of them almost long enough to reach both ends of Dean’s room. His wings seemed to shine like oil when light reflected off of them.

They were the most beautiful thing Dean’s ever seen.

“Whoa,” Dean breathed, completely wonderstruck by how gorgeous Cas looked with his wings, how they seemed to compliment Cas’s hair and...well, his whole body, really.

“I-I’m assuming...you like them?” Cas asked, blushing furiously.

Dean chuckled, crawling closer to Cas, the bedsheets pooling at his waist. “You are utterly breathtaking,” Dean said softly.

Cas blushed harder.

Dean asked, “c-can I touch one?” He added quietly, “I’ll be gentle, I promise.”

Cas swallowed a lump in his throat and said, “o-okay.”

Dean, his hand outstretched, closed the distance between them, brushing Cas’s feathers lightly with his fingertips. His wings were surprisingly soft, and he stroked the feathers slowly, a look of wonder fixed on his face.

After a moment, he pulled away, his eyes meeting Cas’s for the first time since this exchange.

Cas’s eyes were watery again, but his shining smile told Dean all he needed to know. Dean held on to Cas’s hips, pouring his love into a heated kiss. He exhaled and rested his forehead against Cas’s, whispering, “you’re beautiful.”

“You’re not so bad yourself,” Cas worried his bottom lip, a habit he’d taken from Dean, “especially with those glasses on.”

Dean smirked, pulling away from his angel’s embrace and scrunching his nose to push up the frames. “You like these on me, huh?”

Cas hummed noncommittally, which basically meant yes.

Dean said, “so you have a glasses kink and I have a wing kink.”

Cas snorted, the closest thing to confirmation Dean would get.

Dean finally took off his glasses, coming back to reality. “It’s almost time for breakfast. Everyone’s leaving today.” He looked at the clock. “I’m gonna shower. You should too.”

Cas bit back a smirk that said “with you?” so Dean chuckled and said, “not today, darlin’. Sorry.”

Cas pouted playfully and slid off Dean’s bed, leaving his room with a “see you.”

Dean put the Hellhound glasses back in his nightstand drawer — he would definitely be using those again — and got ready for breakfast.

————

After breakfast, it was time to bid goodbye to Jody, Donna, and Claire.

In all honesty, Dean was surprised they stayed at the bunker this long. Sam must have guilt tripped them in some way. Dean appreciated the gesture and the company, nonetheless.

They all exchanged hugs, and with some parting words, the female hunters were gone.

They returned to the war room of the bunker, surprised to see Gabriel crisscrossed on top of it.

“Hey boys,” Gabriel greeted, looking at Dean, Sam, Cas, and Jack.

Cas must read something in his older brother's expression, because he asked, “you're leaving too?”

Gabriel leapt off the table, ruffling Castiel’s hair. “Sure am, kiddo. I’ve been gone too long already.”

Cas, trying not to sound hopeful, asked, “will I see you soon?”

The two angels hugged briefly. “Of course,” Gabriel said. “When you’re ready, I expect you to join the hunt for my stupid brothers and the Prince of Hell.”

Cas nodded. “I will soon,” he promised.

With that, Gabriel disappeared before their eyes.

————

How Dean got kidnapped during a family dinner again, he would never know.

He was tied to a chair, again. In a warehouse, again. Singled out, again. His family out of reach, again. Against a nest of vampires, again.

No Castiel, again.

That last one was a good thing, of course.

The vampires were conversing around a large table, blasting Britney Spears on an old school boombox to drown out their voices.

That’s right. Vampires liked Britney Spears.

Dean glanced at his family, who were all waking up.

He kind of hoped Cas came, this time.

He locked eyes with Sam, then Jody, then Claire, then Donna, and finally Jack. They all looked okay — not seriously injured — at least. 

Suddenly, the radio went static for a few seconds. Then, the music shut off entirely.

Hello, darlin’...

Dean laughed loudly, like a maniac, an ear-splitting grin overcoming his face.

A vampire approached him. “What’s so funny?”

Dean took an extra few seconds to gain his bearings. He went from laughing to complete seriousness in the flick of a switch.

“My husband’s gonna be so pissed.”

As Dean formed another grin, Cas kicked down the warehouse door, in all his trenchcoated glory, his eyes glowing in anger.

Dean watched raptly as Cas violently dispatched the vampires, smiting and stabbing and punching, every inch the seasoned warrior.

He glanced over at his family, realizing that most of them had never seen Cas in his element before. The surprised looks on their faces were unforgettable, and made Dean surge with pride.

This was his husband.

When ten vampire bodies — and an absurd amount of blood — littered the floor, Cas made their hand ties disappear with a snap of his fingers.

As Dean’s family stood up from their chairs, Cas approached Dean, worry lines marring his face.

Dean smiled, his eyes saying “hello darlin’.”

Unamused, Cas grumbled, “I can't leave you alone for two days, can I?”

Dean chuckled despite himself, standing up from his chair. “Maybe I orchestrated this whole thing cause I missed you.”

Cas snorted. “Let’s get out of here.”

————

That night, the entire family stayed over at the bunker. Jody and Donna and Claire thoroughly expressed their amazement at Cas’s badassery over dinner, making the angel blush in embarrassment. 

Now, at ten o’clock, Dean was sitting on the bed, back against the headboard, reading the final Harry Potter book. He’d been slowly but surely reading the series, trying to surprise his nerdy angel.

Speaking of his angel…

Cas opened Dean’s bedroom door, swaddled in the blue blanket Dean had on the morning after Cas woke from his coma, wearing Dean’s old Led Zeppelin tee and loose plaid pajama pants.

Dean closed his book and left it on the nightstand, Cas smiling when he saw the cover. Dean moved over on the bed to make room for Cas. He laid down, resting his head on Dean’s chest, listening to the hunter’s heartbeat. Cas wrapped an arm around Dean’s waist and closed his eyes. Dean leaned down to press a long kiss into Cas’s hair. 

Dean rested his cheek on Cas’s soft dark locks, murmuring, “hey darlin’.” Cas hummed a greeting, pressing himself as close to Dean as possible, like he was trying to melt into the hunter’s body.

Something was on Cas’s mind, something dark and ugly.

Dean knew Cas would speak any moment now.

He focused on pressing kisses to Cas’s head, his form of encouragement, for a few moments.

Cas sighed, and asked, “do you ever regret this?”

Dean exhaled deeply. He knew Cas loved him, and that this wasn’t doubt.

Searching for Lucifer and Michael and Asmodeus was taking more of a toll on Cas than Dean thought.

Dean tilted Cas’s chin upwards, so that he would look into Dean’s eyes. Cas’s eyes were a tsunami, a storm of conflict present in his irises.

Dean said, “there are a lot of things I regret.” A pause, Dean keeping eye contact with Cas. “The only thing I don’t regret,” Dean took Cas’s hand, “is marrying you.”

Cas’s eyes shone brightly at Dean’s answer, the tsunami turning into harmless vapor. If this was a test, Dean must have aced it.

“We’ll get through this, darlin’. We always do.”

**Author's Note:**

> Kudos and comments are appreciated!


End file.
